Snatch the Snacks and Scat

“Snatch the Snacks and Scat”
(a parody of Steve Miller Band’s “Take the Money and Run”)

Verse 1

This here’s a story ‘bout a tuxedo named Mars,
A black-and-white outlaw with her eye on the jars.
She’ll purr at your ankles, she’ll meow at the door —
Then the second you blink, she’s halfway ‘cross the floor.

Chorus

Go on, snatch the snacks and scat!
Snatch the snacks and scatter, yeah.
Go on, snatch the snacks and scat!
Snatch the snacks and scatter, yeah.

Chorus (repeat)

Go on, snatch the snacks and scat!
Snatch the snacks and scatter, yeah.
Go on, snatch the snacks and scat!
Snatch the snacks and scatter, yeah.

Verse 2

Mars saw a chicken strip on the edge of the plate.
She crouched in the shadows, oh, she knew how to wait.
One paw, one pounce, and the whole thing was gone —
Down the hall, past the kitchen, and behind the chaise lounge.

Chorus

Go on, snatch the snacks and scat!
Snatch the snacks and scatter, yeah.
Go on, snatch the snacks and scat!
Snatch the snacks and scatter, yeah.

Chorus (repeat)

Go on, snatch the snacks and scat!
Snatch the snacks and scatter, yeah.
Go on, snatch the snacks and scat!
Snatch the snacks and scatter, yeah.

(instrumental break — imagine a guitar solo while Mars licks butter off a knife)

Verse 3

Now I’m chasin’ that cat with a dish towel in hand.
She’s a slippery little bandit, won’t you please understand?
She’ll cry that she’s starving, she’ll roll on her back,
But the moment you turn ‘round, she’s planning her attack.

Chorus

Go on, snatch the snacks and scat!
Snatch the snacks and scatter, yeah.
Go on, snatch the snacks and scat!
Snatch the snacks and scatter, yeah.

Chorus (repeat)

Go on, snatch the snacks and scat!
Snatch the snacks and scatter, yeah.
Go on, snatch the snacks and scat!
Snatch the snacks and scatter, yeah.

Outro

Mars, Mars, where’d you go, Mars?
Under the couch in her little white spats.
Mars, Mars, you sneaky little star —
Snatch the snacks and scatter, that’s just who you are.

Mars, Mars, where’d you go, Mars?
Hidin’ in the closet with a mouthful of cheese.
Mars, Mars, you sneaky little star —
Snatch the snacks and scatter, if you please.